So what exactly is outreach? This is a very elusive question. We feel best when we can quantify it and say "We do the Hallelujah Party" and "Our church supports this ministry and that ministry." When we can point to different events or actions we feel like we are doing "outreach."
Don't get me wrong, these can be really good things. But my question is--What's behind it? It is a passion that is growing in our hearts that says "I want to give my life, my finances, my relationships, my passions, my children, my comfort, my career, my retirement account, my home, my resources to honoring God, to show my love for Him. I want this to be all about Him, isn't He something." If these good things do not come from the motivation of love, my guess is that they are only a hollow gesture and will be burned up with the rest of the dross.
We aren't perfect in this motivation but the important part is--do we really want it? Do we honestly want to stand up and say "I want to give it all!"? If not, I think we should just hang it up. We are in effect living a lie anyway. We are playing church and making ourselves feel better about ourselves when the truth is that we are already dead (we're just not pushing up daisies yet). Why keep it up?
Bill Hybels at Willow Creek Community Church after one of his messages, "challenged members of the congregation to raise their hands if they were willing to surrender their possessions and lifestyles fully to God and actually decide to use their resources to serve the poor and honor God. There was a time for public declaration of intent.
"Then Bill said he wanted to have a word with all the folks who did not raise their hands. And this is what he said: 'I hope you have a terrible afternoon. And then I hope you have a terrible evening. I hope the Holy Spirit keeps after you, and you have to keep thinking this one through, until you're able to raise your hand as well.'"
I want to say the same thing to us as well. Outreach starts here!
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Thinking in a Direction
We all think in certain directions. We see the world in particular ways. This is brought about by the culture we grow up in, the temperament we are born with, how our family does/did things, the experiences we go through (both good and bad), and the "foundation" we stand on. None of us are immune to this.
In recent years, outreach has been largely defined in christian culture as specific events/programs, organized by specific groups/churches to target specific people, so that they will be drawn to our services. The church in America has done much of this and the results are dismal.
People are leaving the North American church in droves, while the church in so many other places is growing exponentially. So what are we missing?
There are a lot of opinions about this and I will offer mine.
We really don't believe what we say we believe. It's not a reality that permeates our entire life. It's not what we rely on to give us hope in desperation. We rely on personal and financial security, nice homes and enough pleasurable activities to make us "happy." When people see how we do things they don't see life, they see the same old thing in a different package.
I believe that when a pagan gets cancer, a christian gets cancer so the world can see the difference. When pagans go through marriage problems Christians go through marriage problems so the world can see the difference. This list could go on and on.
The problem is that we mostly do things the way the rest of the world does them. We've bought into the lie about how things work, where our security lies, what my comfort is in life and in death, etc. We are seen and dismissed as people who are no different than anyone else but more pitied because we can't even have the "fun" that a pagan life offers.
Our children look at our marriages and don't want what we have so they look to the world's answers because the church's answers (because we claim to live the church's answers) don't give life. They want life! God put the desire in them (and us). We can't fake things like marital satisfaction to our kids.
So how do we get life? What do we say we believe? That our only comfort in life and in death is Jesus Christ?
I believe outreach is first and foremost learning to live loved. What would change inside of me if I lived each moment (the tough and enjoyable) as if I was loved and cherished and special and cared for and upheld by the greatest power in the universe? During cancer, during marital strife, during unemployment, during heartbreak, during the everyday routine, during dealing with my children, being stuck in my sin, during times of depression, during celebrations and time with family and friends, etc?
This is not about having it together and being good. Jesus didn't die to make you good, He died to make you His.
People who live loved are very attractive. When I meet people like that I know I had found something special, something different and I want it. I see parts of this reality in the lives of many at Bridge of Hope and it makes me want it to a greater extent and in even more people (and not just at Bridge)!
I believe effective outreach starts with this: May each of us ask God to make loved living a greater and greater reality in our lives and in our homes. Let's do this and see what He does around us.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
In recent years, outreach has been largely defined in christian culture as specific events/programs, organized by specific groups/churches to target specific people, so that they will be drawn to our services. The church in America has done much of this and the results are dismal.
People are leaving the North American church in droves, while the church in so many other places is growing exponentially. So what are we missing?
There are a lot of opinions about this and I will offer mine.
We really don't believe what we say we believe. It's not a reality that permeates our entire life. It's not what we rely on to give us hope in desperation. We rely on personal and financial security, nice homes and enough pleasurable activities to make us "happy." When people see how we do things they don't see life, they see the same old thing in a different package.
I believe that when a pagan gets cancer, a christian gets cancer so the world can see the difference. When pagans go through marriage problems Christians go through marriage problems so the world can see the difference. This list could go on and on.
The problem is that we mostly do things the way the rest of the world does them. We've bought into the lie about how things work, where our security lies, what my comfort is in life and in death, etc. We are seen and dismissed as people who are no different than anyone else but more pitied because we can't even have the "fun" that a pagan life offers.
Our children look at our marriages and don't want what we have so they look to the world's answers because the church's answers (because we claim to live the church's answers) don't give life. They want life! God put the desire in them (and us). We can't fake things like marital satisfaction to our kids.
So how do we get life? What do we say we believe? That our only comfort in life and in death is Jesus Christ?
I believe outreach is first and foremost learning to live loved. What would change inside of me if I lived each moment (the tough and enjoyable) as if I was loved and cherished and special and cared for and upheld by the greatest power in the universe? During cancer, during marital strife, during unemployment, during heartbreak, during the everyday routine, during dealing with my children, being stuck in my sin, during times of depression, during celebrations and time with family and friends, etc?
This is not about having it together and being good. Jesus didn't die to make you good, He died to make you His.
People who live loved are very attractive. When I meet people like that I know I had found something special, something different and I want it. I see parts of this reality in the lives of many at Bridge of Hope and it makes me want it to a greater extent and in even more people (and not just at Bridge)!
I believe effective outreach starts with this: May each of us ask God to make loved living a greater and greater reality in our lives and in our homes. Let's do this and see what He does around us.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Coming Alongside
This is daily thought from a guy named John Fischer. It has to do with outreach and our relationships with others.
Coming alongside
by John Fischer
I am normally not a fan of ten steps to this or five ways to do that. But for one of my recent talks I came up with these six things to remember about being around those who may not yet be Christians, and thought some of you might find it useful.
1) Assume everyone is searching for God. Why? Because everyone is. We were created this way. God has purposely frustrated humanity by creating us with eternity in our hearts, yet with an inability to fathom what that is or what it means (Ecclesiastes 3:10-11). He has done this so that we might reach out for him and find him though He is not far from any of us for in Him we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:27-28).
2) Come alongside. This is really the crux of it all. Just walk alongside people and enter into their lives. Listen. Talk. Laugh. Cry. Find out where you can contribute and what you can learn. There's something to give and something to receive in every relationship.
3) Point. You don't tell someone what the truth is; you point to it. "There it is over there," or "Here it is in my life." This is why we need to learn to identify truth in the context of the world around us. Truth isn't religious. You don't have to get into a certain posture to see it. It's not something that hasn't been there all along.
4) Find out what people already know before you set out to tell them anything. Don't ever think you have to clear the table and start over. This is why it's so important to listen first. Find out what's already on the table that you can use.
5) You don't have to tell everything you know. Just the next thing.
6) You don't have to correct everything someone says that is wrong. You are not the protector and defender of truth. You don't have to decide where to draw the line. You don't even have to be concerned if someone may be walking away with the wrong idea. You are not that smart anyway because you don't know what's in someone's head. As long as they have something to think about, that's a good thing.
And now here's the one final thing that makes all this possible. It is the most important of all. (This is the one thing that makes all six of these make sense.) We don't save anybody, convince anybody, "win" anybody to Christ or close the deal. All that is God's business. The Holy Spirit is doing this all on His own terms and timetable. We are not salesmen, marketing reps, counselors or prosecutors. We are just friends who come alongside.
If you want to know more about John, go to thecatch@fischtank.com.
I hope that this stirs some thoughts about our outreach.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Coming alongside
by John Fischer
I am normally not a fan of ten steps to this or five ways to do that. But for one of my recent talks I came up with these six things to remember about being around those who may not yet be Christians, and thought some of you might find it useful.
1) Assume everyone is searching for God. Why? Because everyone is. We were created this way. God has purposely frustrated humanity by creating us with eternity in our hearts, yet with an inability to fathom what that is or what it means (Ecclesiastes 3:10-11). He has done this so that we might reach out for him and find him though He is not far from any of us for in Him we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:27-28).
2) Come alongside. This is really the crux of it all. Just walk alongside people and enter into their lives. Listen. Talk. Laugh. Cry. Find out where you can contribute and what you can learn. There's something to give and something to receive in every relationship.
3) Point. You don't tell someone what the truth is; you point to it. "There it is over there," or "Here it is in my life." This is why we need to learn to identify truth in the context of the world around us. Truth isn't religious. You don't have to get into a certain posture to see it. It's not something that hasn't been there all along.
4) Find out what people already know before you set out to tell them anything. Don't ever think you have to clear the table and start over. This is why it's so important to listen first. Find out what's already on the table that you can use.
5) You don't have to tell everything you know. Just the next thing.
6) You don't have to correct everything someone says that is wrong. You are not the protector and defender of truth. You don't have to decide where to draw the line. You don't even have to be concerned if someone may be walking away with the wrong idea. You are not that smart anyway because you don't know what's in someone's head. As long as they have something to think about, that's a good thing.
And now here's the one final thing that makes all this possible. It is the most important of all. (This is the one thing that makes all six of these make sense.) We don't save anybody, convince anybody, "win" anybody to Christ or close the deal. All that is God's business. The Holy Spirit is doing this all on His own terms and timetable. We are not salesmen, marketing reps, counselors or prosecutors. We are just friends who come alongside.
If you want to know more about John, go to thecatch@fischtank.com.
I hope that this stirs some thoughts about our outreach.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
A Conversation About Outreach
Here is your chance to weigh in about how outreach and mission should look at Bridge of Hope. Please take this opportunity and let us know what you are thinking. To make this a healthy, constructive conversation, here are a couple guidelines that we ask you to follow:
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
- Please avoid putting things in terms of "this is the Biblical way and there is no other." The Bible is inerrant but we are not, our understanding is limited. This shuts down conversation before it has a chance to get started.
- God often reveals His will through the body/family, be willing to listen to others.
- Be honest and write with love.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
The Power of Conversation
Have you ever had one of those conversations where someone says something and you had never thought of things that way before? And then afterward that thought sits in the back of your mind and simmers on low until a light bulb goes on? I have that happen to me all the time.
I have been encouraged, challenged, convicted and comforted through the words of others. I have also been discouraged, placated, po-pooed and hurt by the same means.
So what makes the difference? Is it the state of my own heart? Is it the motives of others? Is it that my mind is in one place and not "present"? I think I would have to answer "yes." All of the above have been true for me. The point is that conversation is powerful. It has the potential do very good things be constructive(not always easy and sweetness and light) or to do bad things and be destructive. So what does make the difference?
In the book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People," Stephen Covey says that 2 keys to constructive communication are to "Think Win/Win" and to "Seek first to understand and then to be understood." The purpose of a conversation is not just to get your point across, instead it is to enter into a dynamic, living, breathing relationship with someone where you and others open yourselves up to ideas and concepts and emotions; things that have the potential to change you.
Thinking win/win is much like the Bible says in Phil 2:3-4 "3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." It needs to be my motive in conversation to really hear what a person is saying, where they are coming from, and to enter into their world. My prayer is that they do that for me as well.
Seeking first to understand and then to be understood is to follow James 1:19 "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,"
Let's make every effort to engage in our conversations in this way, anticipating God's presence. Let's trust Him to change us through opening ourselves up to the power of conversation.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
I have been encouraged, challenged, convicted and comforted through the words of others. I have also been discouraged, placated, po-pooed and hurt by the same means.
So what makes the difference? Is it the state of my own heart? Is it the motives of others? Is it that my mind is in one place and not "present"? I think I would have to answer "yes." All of the above have been true for me. The point is that conversation is powerful. It has the potential do very good things be constructive(not always easy and sweetness and light) or to do bad things and be destructive. So what does make the difference?
In the book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People," Stephen Covey says that 2 keys to constructive communication are to "Think Win/Win" and to "Seek first to understand and then to be understood." The purpose of a conversation is not just to get your point across, instead it is to enter into a dynamic, living, breathing relationship with someone where you and others open yourselves up to ideas and concepts and emotions; things that have the potential to change you.
Thinking win/win is much like the Bible says in Phil 2:3-4 "3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." It needs to be my motive in conversation to really hear what a person is saying, where they are coming from, and to enter into their world. My prayer is that they do that for me as well.
Seeking first to understand and then to be understood is to follow James 1:19 "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,"
Let's make every effort to engage in our conversations in this way, anticipating God's presence. Let's trust Him to change us through opening ourselves up to the power of conversation.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Doing Little Things with Great Love
Do you ever feel like the contributions you make are insignificant? Like you are not especially good or spiritual? I think most feel that way. I would even think that some who we would consider very significant would think of themselves as insignificant.
We think that to be important or significant we have to do something amazing. Mother Teresa said "In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love." The important thing is that we do small things that are put before us with great love.
Mike Yaconelli likens this to a mosaic. Thousands of tiny pieces make up a whole. The tiny pieces don't seem like much alone but put them together and you have a work of art. "Our tiny choices and tiny moves toward God may not seem like much. But someday you and I will stand together in the great cathedral of heaven, and up front, by Jesus will hang the most magnificent mosaic we could ever imagine, made up of thousands and thousands of our tiny responses to God's love in our lives." (Mike Yaconelli, Messy Spirituality, p. 119)
Let God love you and make tiny choices to do little things with great love.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
We think that to be important or significant we have to do something amazing. Mother Teresa said "In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love." The important thing is that we do small things that are put before us with great love.
Mike Yaconelli likens this to a mosaic. Thousands of tiny pieces make up a whole. The tiny pieces don't seem like much alone but put them together and you have a work of art. "Our tiny choices and tiny moves toward God may not seem like much. But someday you and I will stand together in the great cathedral of heaven, and up front, by Jesus will hang the most magnificent mosaic we could ever imagine, made up of thousands and thousands of our tiny responses to God's love in our lives." (Mike Yaconelli, Messy Spirituality, p. 119)
Let God love you and make tiny choices to do little things with great love.
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
Monday, December 8, 2008
Ya Gotta Love Conflict!
"Small groups that don't get to the point of anger, don't get to the point of usefulness."
--Steve Brown.
Do you think that's true? What does going through conflicts with those around us accomplish? Is it just looking for trouble? Is it creating a problem that wasn't there before?
I have heard of lot of reasons for avoiding conflict, some of them valid. There are times when we need to let go of our pride and overlook an offense. "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense." --Proverbs 19:11. It takes a good dose of emotional and spiritual maturity to be offended and then be able to overlook it without it coming out in others ways; our attitude around that person, sarcastic comments, talking with others about the issue, anger in our heart, etc.
So how can I know when to engage in conflict and when to overlook something? Here are a few questions to consider:
- When I am around that (those) person (people) do I feel the freedom to engage with them in a respectful way or am I worried about protecting myself or does my anger seems to rise up?
- Do I feel a need to talk about this with other people in order to feel OK or validated?
- What is my attitude toward that person, do I harbor anger in my heart?
To always avoid conflict is not a good thing. Engaging in conflict can be a very important activity if we want to grow emotionally or spiritually. I believe God works through conflict (and gives us opportunities for conflict,) in order to bring about his purposes in our lives.
What's your favorite story? What is the conflict in that story (all interesting stories have conflict)? How does dealing with the conflict effect the characters? Stories of heroism (and cowardice) come in the midst of conflict.
Are you engaging in necessary conflict? If not, what's stopping you? Do you trust that if you go into conflict with love and respect that God will work out His will in the situation? If you are engaging in necessary conflict, are you doing it with love and respect?
Learning to Live Loved,
Deon
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